Love Hawg

2006-04-23T22:58:00.000-04:00

I guess Blogmad was having some problems, but I think I got back on there. All you people threatening me are idiots. You ain't never going to be able to find me. You don't know what it's like to be me, so just shut up. I told you before, I hate whiners. Probably homosexuals no doubt, too scared to leave their names trying to scare me. Whatever man. I've eaten cool whip tougher than you guys.

Tiff ain't pregant, or if she was, she ain't anymore, cause she's been on the rag all weekend. She keeps accusing me of cheating on her, cause me and the boys from the shop stop by the Gentleman's club on the way home sometimes. She needs to understand that she just ain't pretty like those girls are. I tell her she don't need to worry, cause none of them are girlfriend material anyway.

Rico got off on a technicality, again. I swear, if he wasn't Cuban or Mexican or whatever, I'd say he was Irish. I'll talk to you later.

2006-03-15T20:24:00.000-05:00

I've been feeling like shit for the past week or so. I ain't had no blow for 6 days now, not since Rico got arrested again. I talked to him, and his lawyer thinks they can get him off for a due process violation or something like that. I can't wait til he gets out, because I don't want to call my sister about it, cause I know she'll cut the hell out of it. I think Tiff has been keeping a stash to herself, because she ain't been saying nothing when I talk about scoring something.

Oh man, I just forgot something I wanted to tell you guys! I had to break up a fight at the dealership. This colored got an attitude with one of our salesmen. He wanted to test drive a car that was obviously out of his budget, and Adam kept trying to steer him towards other, cheaper cars. He was getting uppity like they all do, and started getting in Adam's face. Well, Adam don't take no shit from no one. He's the only guy in Sales that I respect. When I heard them arguing from the shop, I came out to see what was going on. Adam pushed him, and the colored pushed him back. I knew it was gonna get bad after that, so I ran over there with a wrench, and I grabbed Adam. I said to the guy, "Look blue gums, if you don't get the hell outta here now, I'm gonna get five guys from the shop to say that you came at him first.". Well, he's smarter than the rest of his bunch, cause he took off without another word. Now Adam owes me one. He's just lucky that it happened during the week, cause we get real busy on the weekends.

Thanks to all you people who have came here, except you ones that are being assholes. Y'all can go to hell. I'll talk to you later.

2006-03-13T18:38:00.000-05:00

I just joined this BlogMad thing, cause them other places weren't working or something. Not many people came here. I asked another blogger to let me into it, and I got in. I hope this one works better. I'll talk to you later.

2006-02-18T20:07:00.000-05:00

I ain't had much to say lately. I've kind of had a monkey on my back from partyin' a lot, and I've had the neighbors come by twice and ask me about their damn dog. I just played dumb.

Work is a little more steady, and Tiff thinks she's pregnant again. I told her if it ain't mine, I'm gonna do her like that Scott guy in California did. Besides that, I haven't done much. I'll talk to you later.

2006-01-17T22:18:00.000-05:00

MIke told me today that he might have to lay me off, cause of all the overtime he gave me before, and with how slow the shops been lately . Then, I called my momma on break today, to see if she could help me out, and the bitch hung up on me. Like my daddy, bless his soul, always said, she wasnt good for nothin no how anyway. I decided not to send my child support payment for February. Those money grubbing bitches can learn to do without for a month or two.

Me and Rico stopped off for a few after work today. He could tell I needed to let loose. WE smokeed some more shit, but it's ok, cause I don't do it every day like him. When i got home, Tiff tore into me about it. Not cause I wsa high, but because I didn't bring her home none. That shit kid of hers got suspended from school yesterday, for skipping class. I aint seen him since, but his ass is mine when I catch him.

That fucking dog is dead. I'm pretty sure I killed it, cause I saw them carry it into the car, and I ain't seen it since. They got a garage too, so I doubt they'll think it was me. I kinda felt bad the first night, but I've been sleeping like a baby ever since. I don't know that the hell I'm going to do if I get laid off. I'll talk to you later.

2006-01-11T21:22:00.000-05:00

My god damn neighbor's Retriever barks all night, and they never put him in. I have bad dreams a lot, so my sleep is really precious. I get in a bad mood when I don't get a good nights rest, and that dog has been keeping me up for more than 2 weeks. Last Sunday, I started giving her little bits of antifreeze, because I hear they say that's real bad for dogs and cats. It's been a few days and shes still barking at night, so I'm gonna try a few more times and see what happens.

I think I got the Hawg back in tip top shape. Runnin loud, runnin clean. I just wish I had more time to go ride her. I've been putting in a lot of ot down at the shop lately. With how much Becky asks for every month in child support, I don't have a choice. I love my girls, but I'm getting ready to change my name and move across the country. She's bleedin' me dry. I'm thinking about asking Mike for a raise.

I've been going back to the MacDonalds where I took Jeremy last weekend, to see that colored girl. She says she's 20 years old, and she don't have a boyfriend. I'm pretty sure she'd do me, but I have to think of how I'm going to arrange a date in the drive through. I think I should probably start coming inside to talk to her. I'm gonna have to start working out with all the fries I've been eating. I'll talk to you later.

2006-01-08T07:15:00.000-05:00

I'm gonna wake Jeremy up in about 15 minutes and take him for breakfast at MacDonalds. He really likes them Deluxe Big Breakfasts. I like the Mac Griddles. He and I have been getting along better since the last time I had to have a talk with him. I think he understands that I don't hurt him to be mean, I hurt him cause I love him. I told Tiff to explain to him I don't know no better. That's how Daddy, bless his soul, taught me how to be a man, and that's how I'm gonna teach her, well, our boy. He's got a long way to go, but I'll toughen him up yet.

I caught Tiff talking with some guy on the chat thing again. I came home a little early, and I heard some guy talking, but no one talking back. I didn't really hear what he said, and she shut it off when she heard I was home. I told her if that's how she wants to play, fine. I can find someone on the side just as easily. Then she started with the waterworks, saying they're just friends, but I don't buy her bullshit. That's why we're going to MacDonalds. There's this colored girl that's been giving me the eye, and I've never done that kind before. She's got a big ass, and the Hawg likes that. I'll talk to you later.

2005-12-31T22:05:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year everybody!!! I'm on so much coke its crazy! Rico stopped by tonight on the way to his moms house and got me and Tiff really high! I usually dont smoke the stuff, but Rico and Tiff convinced me that new year only comes once a year, haha! Tiff wants me to say hi to yall, so hi! Sorry I aint done this in a while!

Our fucking nosey-ass neighbor called the police cause our son got into my bottle of Ezra and passed out in the front yard. Since then, this hardass has been coming around a few times a week to check up on us. With all that goin on, I had to let loose tonight. My teeth are sweating. Tiff and me are staying in tonight, cause I dont need anymore problems with the law, and I tend to have bad luck most every New Years eve.

I almost forgot about my blog thing. I'll write some more stuff soon, I promise. I'll talk to you later!

2005-11-13T07:27:00.000-05:00

I just found out yesterday that my sister's boyfriend made her get an abortion. That stupid whore. I'm ashamed to call her my sister. She lays around with all these minorities, and doesn't even make em pull out. Then she gets knocked up, and has abortions to take care of it. She can bet that this is the last time I score them some shit.

My bike ain't running right, and I can't seem to find out whats the deal. I've done all the work myself up until now, but I think I might have to take it in. She just ain't riding right.

I caught Tiff's god damned kid stealing my cigarettes last week. She says I hit him too hard, but I told her the Arabs would have cut his whole hand off. I told her that boy needs to toughen up before he ends up like his swishy uncle. Always crying all the time. I swear, the next time that kid tells me I ain't his daddy, the last thing he's gonna see is the back of my hand. I tried to teach him how to fight one day, but he got a bloody nose and went crying to him mama, like he usually does. I'll talk to you later. I need a beer.

2005-10-27T20:34:00.000-04:00

Sorry I ain't put anything on here for a while. I've been real busy at work and all. Rico got locked up for hittin' his old lady again, so I had to bail him out. Mike likes the work that Rico does, so he let me pull some overtime to cover it. Rico owes me bigtime now, but he left an 8 ball for me the last time he came by, so I'm not getting on his case about it. I caught Tiff getting into in when I was in the shower. She came in, said she was looking for her makeup, but I knew something was up, cause she wasn't going anywhere. She wasn't counting on the fact that I weigh it every time. I had a few "words" with her about, and I don't think she'll be having sticky fingers anytime soon. I'll talk to you later.

2005-10-09T20:08:00.000-04:00

So I took Tiff's kid to look for a costume while she was getting her hair done this weekend. I took him to Wal-Mart, Target, even the damn K Mart, and he still didn't make up his mind. He didn't want a Harry Potter costume. He didn't want a Spider-Man costume. He didn't want to be a vampire. So I told him if he didn't make up his damn mind, I was gonna make him wear the Cinderella costume. He started crying, like he usually does. I warned him though, if he went crying to his momma about this again, he was gonna have hell to pay. I told him if he didn't stop acting like a little girl, I was gonna give him something to cry about. I swear, if Jeremy don't toughen up, he's gonna start runnin' with the boys like Tiff's uncle. I think he ended up choosing some Power Ranger suit.

The check out girl was so cute! She couldn't have been more than 15 years old, but damn that uniform she wore was skin tight. I don't know how she could breathe in that get up. I saw her eyein' me when I was taking out my wallet. Too bad honey, I'll look you up in about 3 years, hahaha! I think Jeremy wised up, cause his momma didn't say nothing before she went to bed. Kid's finally learning. I'll talk to you later.

2005-10-05T21:43:00.000-04:00

Man, I was just looking at this one website, and that Paris Hilton girl is HOT!!! Tiff gets so jealous when I talk about her, you gotta see it. She finally came home. After 2 days, I called her momma's house, but I guess she wasn't really staying there. She was staying with her pansy friend Mark. Man, I can't stand that guy. The son of a bitch actually carries a purse. If theres one thing I don't like, it's a man who's afraid to be a man. At least I don't have to worry if she was screwing him.

This whole blog thing is turning out to be pretty fun. I've already made some friends, and some of you have even said something back to me. Thanks for listening. I don't tell the people at work about it, cause I've heard people get fired for that. With all the God damn (sorry Lord) child support I have to pay to Becky, plus paying for Tiff's fucking kid, I barely see a dime as is. I got little ventures on the side to make sure my entertainment is covered, if you know what I mean. I'll talk to you later.

2005-10-01T02:17:00.000-04:00

Man, what a shitty day. This fat cow came in today complaining that someone got oil all over the interior of her precious little japanese sissy car. Since I'm in charge of that department, the morons at the front desk called me in to deal with her. She goes on and on about how she wants us to pay for the cleaning, so I told her I'd have to see it first. I saw it, and it wasn't shit. I told her it looked like she spilled some soda, cause it didn't smell like any oil. I asked if she had been through any drive-thrus lately. She got all pissy, and threw a huge fit. She said she wanted to speak with the owner. I told her if she needs to talk to Mike, she needs to make an appointment with his secretary. I told her that we're not gonna pay for any cleaning if she can't hold on to her food. I don't care. I know Mike won't fire me. We've been friends since Junior High.

Then, when I get home, Tiff is on my computer, talking to guys in a chat room or some shit. All I did was put my hand on her shoulder, but she stars crying, saying I hurt her. She should know better than to piss me off when I've had a bad day. And then she started cutting into me about my drinking, saying if I wouldn't stop by the pub after work, I wouldn't be acting like this. I told her if she doesn't like it, then she can get the fuck out of my house. She stormed out, AGAIN, but called me like 2 hours later, crying as usual. "I love you, I'm sorry...". The usual crap. I told her she can come back tomorrow if she minds her p's and q's. Besides, from the blogs I've seen tonight in this battle thing, I've got enough babes to keep me company for the evening, if you know what I mean. I'll talk to you later.

2005-09-27T22:35:00.000-04:00

cool, it worked! I'll talk to you later.

2005-09-27T22:23:00.000-04:00

I had a chinaman at work that I get along with show me how to make pictures on the internet today during my break. He signed me up at some website that makes pictures for you. He said that all I have to do is copy one of the boxes and put it in here, so that's what I'm going to do. It's late, so if this don't work, I'll fix it later.

2005-09-24T18:38:00.000-04:00

I hate it when Tiffanys mom calls, cause everytime, Tiff starts crying about something when she gets off the phone. It always happens. I guess her mom told her that her uncle Charlie has some kind of cancer, I cant remember what kind. Hes not even that sick yet, and shes in tears over it. I told her if he wasnt so light in the feet, this wouldnt happen. I dont care anyway, im not going to miss him.

I get really mad when I read some of these liberals whining about Bush on their blog. Dont people have better things to write about? I love our Commander-in-Chief, but I dont have to brag to peope about it. And I swear, all the blogs that cry about W have some link about gay marriage too. Go figure. I found some place that makes other people read your blog, so hopefully, I'll talk to you later.

2005-09-23T18:10:00.000-04:00

I bet those people in Texas are going to say the same thing that rapper did, and say that Rita is Bushes fault. They don't deserve houses if their too stupid to avoid a hurricane. I voted for Bush, and anyone who didnt is obviouslt a moron.

How do I put links and pictures on my blog? I've seen a lot of cool stuff on other blogs that I want to do, but I dont know how, and neither does Tiff. I'd really like your guys help, if anybody reads this. Thanks, I'll talk to you later.

2005-09-16T20:07:00.000-04:00

My stupid ass sister Jenny called me this morning. I guess her boyfriend got her pregnant. And this is on top of the other cuban girl he got pregnant 2 months ago. I asked her if she wanted me to kick his ass, but she went on about how he said hes going to step up and be a man this time. Whatever, I know I'll end up paying for it either way, like I end up paying for every illegitimate kid in America. Bless Daddys soul I love her, but she needs to keep her legs crossed.

Why are all the blogs I see when I use next blog nothing but advertisements for stuff? I dont mind the ones with girls on them, but aren't there other real blogs out there? And I hate all these little chinese blogs with the popups. They probably have viruses and spy stuff on them.

2005-09-12T09:49:00.000-04:00

I just got some powder coated lower forks for my bike. Me and Rico were working my my hawg today. Tiffany drank the last beer without telling us. She started crying cause she said I yelled at her, but I got her to go to the liquor market anyway. Oh yeah, Tiffany is my girlfriend, and Rico is my hombre from work. After we did some of that primo dope he gets, she cooled down a bit. That's usually how I shut her up.

I've been reading a lot of other blogs, and people whine a lot. I can't stand whiners. Neither could my daddy. I'm so sick of people blaming Bush for making the hurricane. If they just got off welfare, their houses wouldnt be underwater. I'll talk to you later.

2005-09-09T16:36:00.000-04:00

I had a good day at work today. This lady that was really hot came in, and I talked to her for a while. I might look up her number on the computer and call her, cause she was really hot. I told her about my bike. It's a 1970 Shovel Head. This baby aint for no pansy ass doctors and dentists, this is a real bike. All the girls love riding my bike, if you know what I mean. When I can figure out how to make a picture in the blog, I'll show you a picture. OK, I have to go, so I'll talk to you later.

2005-09-03T18:27:00.000-04:00

Hi everyone. My name is Love Hawg. I used to have another blog, but I had a lot of problems with it, and ended up deleting it. I think I'll try this blogging thing again. So how are you guys? I live in Florida, about 7 miles away from my sister Jenny. I work at a car dealership. NO, I dont sell them, so you cant have a discount. I work on the cars. I also work at the reception desk. Well, I have to go, so I'll talk to you later.

Preface

2000-05-06T18:14:00.000-04:00

Hey Y'all :P

Murderface (Tickles_Tapeworm) here.

This is all fake. I think racism is stupid, I think doing lots of coke is stupid, I think hitting your wife and kids is stupid, I think killing dogs is stupid, and I think people from the south are stupid.